some randomly conceived thoughts-

you know, it only takes an instant to turn someone from interesting to boring.

and i think i have. looking back at my life last year, or last last year, this year has been... pretty dull. same old routines, just a couple of fun times here and there, and awful times too... not that much... and, yea. most of my days are pretty much the same.

somehow i've gone... mellow. and it's not just externally, but internally too. i don't really like parties as much anymore... i'm more school-oriented (althought not so much), i hardly miss classes and i don't enjoy concerts as much anymore. i mean, yea parties are fun.. so are concerts but i'd only go to the ones i'm really interested in. oh, and they MUST not clash or interfere with my schedule. in the past two years, I've always decided what i wanna do. i'd go to concerts even if it meant missing my classes, or pushing aside my schedules. i'd go shopping on the weekdays even if the following week, or even day, was my exams. nowadays, it seems like my life's controlled by external factors. schedules, deadlines, or sheer responsibility and all the what-have-you.

i don't know if this is a good thing, or if it's a bad thing. after all, in a year's time from now i'll be entering "adulthood". that is, i'll be out of school and i have to start working. i don't know if it means that i should prepare for it by getting used to "not having so much fun" so that i'll not be "shocked" when the time comes, or if i should just enjoy the "last few moments" of freedom and think about the future "later". after all, i've been a lil crazy the last two years...

i don't know if this is the year to learn to be "normal". or whatever you call it. you know, like not go to concerts so much... if going to concerts is considered "crazy" (as some people think it is...) or party less and do more "normal" things like studying, thinking about the future, blah blah... or spend less because the economy's not doing well (which is, in an indirect way, responsibility)... ughh. and i hate it because they all sound so boring but what can i say?